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THE TRUTH ABOUT YOUR PAIN
Exploding The Myths That Make Us Miserable - Part 3 of 6
07-24-11 Sermon
We’re in the series on “Exploding The Myths That Make Us Miserable.” I want to talk about the truth about pain. You know, America is a pain conscious nation. Everywhere you look we’ve got advertisements for pain relievers, pain killers, pain reducers. Science continues to come up with new formulas. We’ve gone from aspirin to Tylenol, to ibuprofen, to nuproxin; they’re coming up with new and new pain killers. When pharmacies are robbed, it is pain killers that are taken, not cash. It seems like the whole world’s got a headache if you look at it from the advertising view point. So, the fact is pain is part of life. If you’re a human being, you’ll have physical pain, you’ll have emotional pain, and you’ll have spiritual pain.
Now, the world has taught you many myths about pain that just aren’t true. Some of them are harmless but one very destructive myth is this: MYTH, “If I ignore my pain, it will go away.” In other words, if I block it out of my memory, if I pretend it never happened, if I gloss over it, then I won’t be in pain. Beneath that is another myth that says, It’s easier to avoid problems than it is to face them. That’s just not true. Psychologist Scott Peck has said this, “Fearing pain, almost all of us to a greater or lesser degree, attempt to avoid problems. We procrastinate hoping they will go away. We ignore and pretend they don’t exist. We attempt to get out of them rather than suffer through them.” This tendency to avoid problems and the emotional pain inherent is, listen to this, “The primary basis of human mental illness.” The desire and attempt to avoid pain and our problems is “the primary basis for human illness.” Now, the fact is, God doesn’t want you to ignore your pain, He wants you to discover the cause so you can find real relief.
Pain is like a warning light and it’s saying something’s wrong in my life. Is it wise to ignore a warning light? No, it’s not. And it’s not wise to ignore your pain; it’s saying something’s wrong. The TRUTH is: Pain is a tool God uses for good in my life. Now, the problem is we often don’t understand it; we don’t realize what the good is. In fact, Jesus said in John 13:7 (NIV), “Jesus replied, ‘You don’t realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.’” And, nowhere is that truth more appropriate than pain because often pain comes into our life and we don’t understand why it’s there or what it’s there for. We don’t see any purpose in it and if pain doesn’t have a purpose, it’s very difficult to handle.
This morning, I’d like to take you through some things God says about pain in His Word. First, five ways God uses pain for good in your life.
I. HOW CAN GOD USE MY PAIN FOR GOOD?
1. God Uses Pain To Goad Me. That means to motivate me; goad means to spur into action. Pain spurs us into action like nothing else. I mean, I don’t want to go to a dentist until the pain gets so bad that the pain is greater than my fear, and then I’ll move into action. “We don’t change when we see the light, we change when we feel the heat.” Pr. 20:30 (GN) says, “Sometimes it takes a painful experience to make us change our ways.” Do you agree with that verse? Yeah. You see, pain prompts us to do things we’d rather put off; it prods us and it pushes us and it compels us to change. Pain forces us to change when we don’t want to change. By the way, do you know how many psychiatrists it takes to change a light bulb? One, but the light bulb must really want to be changed. [Laughter] Now, pain really makes you want to be changed. Usually when we hit bottom, then we’re ready to change. That’s the Prodigal Son’s example here in Lk 15:14‑18 (GN), (Prodigal Son) “ . . . spent everything he had . . . and way hungry . . . . At last he came to his senses and said . . . ‘I’ll get up and go to my father . . . .” The hunger pains finally motivated him to move. Do you ever have hunger pains? Some of us have them perpetually. Let’s get back to the point here: God uses pain to motivate me, to goad me, and we’d rarely change if we didn’t have any pain in our life.
Sometimes chest pain will get a person to change his/her eating habits. Sometimes breathing problems will get a person to stop smoking. Sometimes a DUI arrest will get a person to stop drinking. Pain can goad us, or motivate us to change.
Number two:
2. God Uses Pain To Guide Me. In other words, like a bit in a horse’s mouth, God takes pain and He turns us in different directions because of the pain. Ps. 11971‑72 (LB), “ . . . it was the best thing that could have happened to me, for it taught me to pay attention to your laws.” Now, David is saying, Pain is a teaching tool. Has God ever had to get your attention through pain? Oh yeah, and you’re very well aware of that. You see, God whispers to us in our pleasure, but He SHOUTS to us in our pain. He says, “I want your attention” and boy does He get it when you’re in pain. It’s like a direct signal. Now, sometimes it doesn’t take a lot of pain ‑‑ you know just like a little rudder can turn a big ship ‑‑ sometimes just a little pain in your life will lead you in a new direction and God not only goads us into action, but He guides us through pain. And so, like when a baby cries, that means I need to be changed, and so pain means something needs to be changed. Look at the next verse. Heb 12:7 (LB), “Let God train you, for he is doing what any loving father does for his children. Whoever heard of a child who was never corrected?” Look at the word “train,” because sometimes the only way to train is through pain. How many of you who are parents would rather not have to discipline your children? Sure. How many of you parents, even though you’d rather not have to discipline, sometimes have to do it anyway for their own good? Sure. And, why do you do it? Out of love.
God is the same way. God doesn’t like to bring pain in your life, but sometimes he has to do it anyway, to discipline you, to train you, to move you in the right direction. It’s not because He’s angry, it’s not because He’s retaliating, it’s not because He doesn’t like you and wants to get revenge, it’s because He loves you. You see, Aristotle once said, “Some things we only learn through pain.” In fact, some things you learned by being burned. In fact, I would say this, The person who has never suffered, really knows nothing. I don’t like to be around people who have never had any pain in their life, I really don’t. They’re phony, they’re fake, they’re superficial. They think everything is so easy. It’s not. In fact, I would say that the greatest insights in life are found at the center of pain. That’s where they’re found. Some things you are only going to learn through pain because you’re a human being. And so, God goads us but He also guides us with the pain that we have in our lives. But, we never need to doubt God’s love. His motive behind all of the pain is to guide us; it’s for our good.
3. God Uses Pain Not Only To Goad Me, To Guide Me, But He Uses It To Gauge Me. In other words, it’s a measuring tool. God uses pain to help you see what you’re like on the inside. For instance, when I experience pain, the way I react to it measures my faith. My commitments can be gauged by how I react to pain. My maturity can be gauged by how I react to pain. My patience can be gauged by how I react to pain. It’s one way of seeing what’s on the inside of you. People are like tea bags ‑‑ you don’t know what’s in them until you drop them in hot water. And, you really don’t know what’s inside you until you’ve faced the test of pain.
The Bible often compares pain to a refining fire. Like a fire you heat up to refine gold or silver and, as it heats the gold or silver, the impurities are burned off; the dross is burned off. And so, God wants to use pain in your life to burn off some impurities, to burn off some things that shouldn’t be there. Now, the question is the hurt that you’re feeling right now, the pain that you’re experiencing this week, what are you allowing it to burn off in your life? If you let it, pain will burn off selfishness ‑‑ it just makes you a lot more unselfish. If you let it, it will burn off materialism ‑‑ the grip of having to have things really don’t matter when you’re in pain. It’s a great refiner of ego and pride ‑‑ pain pops that ego balloon real quick. It will burn off impatience…, so many things. God says, “I want to refine you through this process.” Isa. 48:10 (NIV), “I have tested you in the furnace of affliction.” It says, I’ve tested you; pain is a test, it exposes the real you, it shows what you’re like on the inside. You know why? Because it’s impossible to maintain an “image” when you’re in pain. You know, when you’re feeling good ‑‑ I mean, you’ve got your hair done, you’ve got your makeup on, you’ve got your nails done, you’ve got your best clothes on, you’ve got your bling on, you’re feeling pretty good, you’ve got your image, you even walk a certain way, but just give you three days at home with the flu and your hair is all disheveled, you look ugly, ugly, ugly, and you couldn’t care less about image. Why? Because you’re miserable and when you’re miserable, you don’t care about image. And, God says that’s good because you ought to care more about character than you do about image.
Pain tests character. I mean, you may say, “I am a person of integrity,” but when the pain is on, will you stand for the truth or will you buckle under and compromise. You may say, “I’m totally committed to Christ,” but when pain occurs, because of your commitment to Christ, do you want to throw in the towel and forget it? You see, you can say one thing, but pain reveals what you’re really are. Look at this verse. James 1:2‑3 (Mes), “. . . tests and challenges come at you from all sides. (And) You know that under pressure, your faith life is forced into the open and shows its true colors.” He’s saying here, pressure shows what you’re like on the inside. Now, what does pressure reveal about your faith? When you’re in the squeeze at the office or at home, or at school, what are the true colors that show up there? Are you a fair weather believer, or are you a consistent believer? You see, this is the reason why the children of Israel spent 40 years in the wilderness. You know, it would have only taken them about two weeks to march from Egypt to Israel, but it took them 40 years. Why? Because out in that desert, God let them wander around and around and around and He put them through seven tests so they would know what they were like on the inside. He was goading them, He was guiding them, and He was gauging them. Notice this verse here. Deut. 8:2 (LB), “God led you through the wilderness for forty years, humbling you and testing you to find out how you would respond, and whether or not you would really obey him.”
It is interesting that the root word for wilderness in Hebrew means a place of hearing. God sent the people of Israel into the wilderness so they would listen to him and learn from him. For 40 years he was asking them, Can you hear me now? He provided for all their needs there. But they needed to learn to trust him.
Some of you may be going through a wilderness, a desert experience, a place of hearing, right now. And, in the desert, things dry up. Maybe you’re in an emotional wilderness right now, maybe you’ve had a relationship dry up, maybe you’ve had your finances dry up, maybe you’ve had an opportunity dry up and you’re going through the desert, maybe you’ve had your health dry up. God says, “It’s a test.” And He says, “I’m gauging you so you’ll know what’s inside of you.” And, when you go through those tough times and you say, “I don’t have any feelings at all, I just don’t feel anything,” you’re going through a desert. “I feel so apathetic,” you’re in the wilderness. And God maybe be gauging you, He may be guiding you, He may be goading you or, number four, he may be guarding you.
4. God Uses Pain To Guard Us. Sometimes God uses pain to protect us from something worse, something far worse. Sometimes He uses pain to protect us and prevent us from getting involved in something that we shouldn’t be involved in. Like, He doesn’t want you in a certain place so you’re not there, because of pain. So, God uses it to guard us. Pain can be a blessing in disguise. I mean, for instance, if you have a fever, that is a way that your body tells you that you probably have an infection in your body that needs to be dealt with and, if you never had any fever, that infection could take over your body—you might even die from it. In fact, a minor pain can often trigger an awareness of a life-threatening disease and, if you didn’t have that pain, you’d never know it and you’d be gone. Sometimes God uses pain to guard us. I’m simply saying this, Emotions, painful emotions, say something’s out of kilter here. And, when I feel depression, or when I feel resentment, or anger, or worry, or when I feel apathy, or when I feel fear, or when I feel hostility, it is saying to me something is out of whack in my life, something’s out of balance, and God’s saying, “I want you to get this corrected” ‑‑ the emotions are the symptom of it. God uses pain to guard us, to protect us.
You know that Middle Eastern shepherds, sometimes have a sheep or a lamb that’s prone to wander ‑‑ like it won’t stay with the flock but it tends to run off by itself ‑‑ and they want to protect it, they don’t want it to fall off some cliff. They know that if it gets out there by itself some wolf will eat it or it will get caught in the briars or something like that, they want to keep it close, do you know what they’ll do? A lamb that is prone to wander, they will break one of its legs. Now, that sounds pretty cruel, but they’re doing it out of love. They will break its leg and put a splint on it so that little sheep can only hobble along until the leg heals and the sheep is going, “I’ve got this splint, now I can’t get away,” and the shepherd’s going, “That’s exactly right,” and he’s a good shepherd. Sometimes God allows pain in your life and puts a splint on your life that keeps you from wandering too far from the flock. And you may resent it, and you may resist it, but it’s because God loves you; He’s guarding you.
Do you remember the story of Joseph in the Bible? I mean, the guy’s story, the first chapter of his life is like a horror story; everything went wrong for this guy. And, for forty years he’s neglected, and he’s rejected, and he’s sold into slavery by his brothers and falsely accused of rape, and he’s thrown into prison, and then he’s forgotten in prison, falsely accused. I mean his whole life is a just a massive heartache. But, if you read the end of the story, you realize that God was preparing him and, through those circumstances, he ends up being second in command in Egypt and saved not only Egypt, but Israel.
At the end of his life Joseph says to his brothers who sold him into slavery, Gen 50:20 (NIV), “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good . . . ” There may be people in your life who mean to harm you. They may have harmed you as a child, they may be harming you right now, emotionally, physically, or in some other way they’re out to harm you and, that may hurt, but, God says, “I have a plan and purpose bigger than that and they mean it for bad, but I mean it for good.” You see, all along in Joseph’s life, God was guarding, and guiding, and goading, and gauging Joseph for greatness because, listen, there is no greatness without pain. And so he says, “You meant it for bad, but God meant it for good; He was guarding me.” You know, what I like about Joseph is later on in life he had two sons and he named them Manasseh and Ephraim. Do you know what they mean? Manasseh means in Hebrew: He made me to forget. And Ephraim means: Fruitful or successful. And, later on in life, after 40 years of pain, he could say “God has blessed me so much and I can see the picture clearer now, that it’s made me forget all of that pain from my childhood and He’s made me successful now.” And God wants to do that in your life.
5. God Uses Pain To Grow Me, to make me mature. Margaret Clarksen has written a book called “Grace Grows Best In Winter” and I love that title. You see, it is possible to grow spiritually and emotionally during bright, healthy, cheerful, sunny days of summer when everything’s going great and life’s fantastic. Sure you can grow in that but, you grow far faster and far deeper in the dark phase of the soul. You grow far deeper and far greater in the valleys rather than in the mountain tops ‑‑ it’s just the way you’re made. Many people will testify-- I’ve had the toughest time of my life but I’d have to say that I’ve grown more through this separation than any other time in my life.” “I’ve grown more through this unemployment than any other time in my life.” “I’ve grown more through this loss of a loved one than in any other time in my life.” “I’ve grown more through this illness than in any other time in my life.” “I’ve grown more through this crisis than in any other time in my life.” “I’ve grown more through this loneliness than in any other time my life.” Because grace grows best in winter and God uses pain to grow me. James 1:4 (LB), “For when the way is rough, your patience has a chance to grow. So let it grow, and don’t try to squirm out of your problems . . . then you will be ready for anything, strong in character, full and complete.”
Somewhere on your outline would write this sentence in: Pain is the high cost of growth. I mean, its trite, but its true; there is no gain without pain. It just doesn’t come any other way. There are no five easy steps to life becoming wonderful. There is no gain without pain. The fact is, we want the product without the process. What’s the product? Oh, we want the maturity, we want the emotional stability, we want the health and wholeness, we want the confidence and the meaning and significance and purpose of life, but we don’t want the process which is pain and suffering, and tough times. We want all of the stability and wholeness of emotions, but we don’t want to go through the process. But, you can’t short circuit it. In fact, if I were to summarize everything I want to say to you this morning, it would be this: The very thing that discourages you the most God uses to develop you and it is not an accident. Look at what the message says, James 1:4. “. . . So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well developed.”
You know, when I read the Bible and I read the Psalms and I see these moving, powerful, intense Psalms, I begin to think how was David able to write so eloquently, these moving Psalms. Well, all you have to do is think about his childhood because if you want a dysfunctional family, David had it. I mean, he was rejected, he was put out to pasture to take care of the sheep at the farthest end while everybody else was at home partying He spent time alone, he was not loved by his father ‑‑ that’s very obvious ‑‑ he was considered the least in his family, he went through loneliness, rejection, neglect, all of those things. And then Saul chased him all over the countryside for 17 years trying to kill him. It was during those painful times he wrote some of the most beautiful Psalms.
Paul says it like this, talking about the pain he has experienced, 1 Cor. 1:9 (Ph), “(This happened) . . . so we might learn to trust, not in ourselves, but in God . . . .” You see, you don’t know, you really don’t know that Jesus Christ is all you need until Jesus Christ is all you’ve got. Then you’ll know it.
Your pain matters to God, it does. And He hurts with you, and He cares about you. Now, pain never leaves you where it finds you; it always moves you. You need to allow your pain to move you into the loving arms of Jesus Christ. Look at this verse on your outline. Gal. 3:4 (Ph), “Has all your painful experience brought you nowhere?” What I’m saying here is don’t waste your hurt, don’t waste your pain. Pain turns some people into saints but it turns other people into devils. It makes some people bitter, it makes some people better, and that’s your choice. Robert Johnson says, “Pain is inevitable, it’s a part of life, but misery is optional”. And, if you let your hurts-- emotional, physical, or whatever, lead you into a relationship with Christ and to know Him, then you will be able to say like Paul said in 2 Cor 7:9 (LB), “Now I am glad . . . not because it hurt you but because the pain turned you to God . . . .” My plea to you today is that you will give your hurt and your heart to Jesus Christ, the great physician.
1 Peter 4:19 (LB) says, “If you are suffering according to God’s will, keep on doing what is right and trust yourself to the God who made you, for he will never fail you.” You can’t say that about anybody else. JESUS WILL NEVER FAIL YOU.
I want to encourage you to close today with a little self-evaluation. Think of the hurt that you’re going through and the pain you’re going through and ask yourself this, Father, are you using this to goad me, to motivate me into action, to do something I know I ought to be doing anyway? Are you using this pain to guide me, to point me in a new direction? Are you using this pain to gauge me, to help me measure myself and see what I’m really like on the inside and see what needs to be changed. Is it a warning light that something’s out of kilter? Are you using this pain to guard me, to protect me from something worse, to keep me from wandering too far, to keep me dependent upon you? Are you using this pain to grow me, to make me more like your Son, Jesus Christ? Paul said, “(This happened) . . . so that we might learn to trust, not in ourselves, but in God.”
One other Truth about pain—It won’t last forever.
Did you know that when Jesus died on the cross, he didn’t just die there for your sins? He died for your sicknesses and your pains as well. Look at this verse from Isaiah 53 describing Jesus’ ministry:
Surely he took up our infirmities (diseases) and carried our sorrows (pains), yet we considered him stricken by God, smitten by him, and afflicted. But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed. Is. 53:4-5
In case you are not sure that this is how that verse is supposed to be understood, look at the next one from Matthew 8 that refers to those verses from Isaiah 53.
When evening came, many who were demon-possessed were brought to him, and he drove out the spirits with a word and healed all the sick. This was to fulfill what was spoken through the prophet Isaiah: “He took up our infirmities and carried our diseases.” Mt. 8: 16-17
Jesus was concerned about those suffering physical pain and he healed them. Look at the next verse from Matthew 4:
News about him spread all over Syria, and people brought to him all who were ill with various diseases, those suffering severe pain, the demon-possessed, the epileptics and the paralytics, and he healed them. Mt. 4:24
We are going to pray for anyone in pain this morning, but I want you to know that if you have given your life to Christ, this world is not your home, heaven is your home and when you get to heaven there will be no more pain of any kind. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. Rev. 21:4 There is no such promise for the one who has not given their life to Christ, but for those who have done that, you will eventually go to a better place where there is no pain anymore, forever.
[prayer for those in pain]
Let’s bow our heads:
Father, I know that there are many people here today that are in pain. Some of them have been carrying a load for weeks, for months, some having been carrying loads for years, and it hurts. Thank you that you care about our pain and our hurt.
Now, why don’t you talk to God. Why don’t you say this,
Dear God, would you help me with my hurt. Thank you that it matters to you. Thank you that I matter to you. Thank you that you love me. Thank you that you sent your Son, Jesus Christ, for my sake. Not to explain my pain away but to walk through it with me. And, so today, dear Jesus, I ask you to take every part of my life, especially the part that hurts, and use it for good in my life and help me walk through this. I want to trust you and I want to know you. In your name I pray. Amen
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